Friday, January 2, 2009

where have all the snowmen gone?

You snowmen aficionados may now stop defending the snowman as a "winter symbol." They are not and I have extremely reliable research data as proof.

Tonight as I drove across town to pick up a pizza, I deliberately took several twists and turns, looking for snowmen: inflatable or otherwise.

If the snowman is truly a winter symbol, why have they all disappeared from front yards just 8 days after Christmas?

Further, where are the snowmen sweaters? Mugs, towels, plates and candle holders? I hazard a guess that most of the snowman bric-a-brac in stores is now reduced by at least 50%, with an additional senior citizen 15% discount on Wednesdays at Kohl's. Winter's only 11 days old, so why the hasty exit of the snowman if he's a rootin'-tootin' authentic winter symbol?

OK, my neighbor Dove probably still has a snowman flag on her porch, but that doesn't count. We've gone around concerning snowmen for years and she is leaving it out just to spite me.

Let's be honest. Snowmen are the brilliance of retailers to boost their Christmas profits, nothing more. Worse, snowmen have absolutely nothing to do with the real meaning of Christmas. In fact, I maintain that snowmen represent the ultimate, disgusting secularization of Christmas.

The only good snowman is a real one, built after an 8-inch snowfall by kids who have no business staying in the house with their mothers. The bigger the snowman, the better.

While we're at it, let's put the song "Jingle Bells" in its rightful place: also a winter symbol. Go ahead, sing that song. Is Christmas even mentioned?

God sent his son to a dusty desert in the Middle East. We'd do better to hang donkeys, camels and olives on our Christmas trees.

Happy new year!


Anonymous said...

You left off the kindly wooden snowman on my porch that faces the Haller porch. He's there for you, too.

But I do agree: the best snowmen are real, and they can be made whenever we get the snowfall.

barb said...

I'll be cordial to him ... !

Anonymous said...

For the record, my absolute favorite Christmas special is Frosty! Could have something to do with his cute, little sidekick and me sharing the same name :)

Dove, stand strong, my friend!!!

And as for Jingle Bells, it was never intended as a Christmas song, but for fun during Victorian winters. It's a cute story, really :)

Dashing through the snow
In a one horse open sleigh
O'er the fields we go
Laughing all the way
Bells on bob tailsa[›] ring (Or Hear our voices ring)
Making spirits bright
What fun it is to laugh and sing (Or What fun it is to ride and sing / Oh, what fun it is to sing)
A sleighing song tonight
|: Jingle bells, jingle bells,
Jingle all the way;
Oh! what fun [joy] it is to ride
In a one-horse open sleigh.
Jingle bells, jingle bells,
Jingle all the way;
Oh! what fun [joy] it is to ride
In a one-horse open sleigh.:|
A day or two ago
I thought I'd take a ride
And soon, Miss Fanny Bright
Was seated by my side,
The horse was lean and lank
Misfortune seemed his lot
He got into a drifted bank
And then we [And we—we] got upsotb[›].
|: chorus :|
A day or two ago,
The story I must tell
I went out on the snow,
And on my back I fell;
A gent was riding by
In a one-horse open sleigh,
He laughed as there I sprawling lie,
But quickly drove away.
|: chorus :|
Now the ground is white
Go it while you're young,
Take the girls tonight
and sing this sleighing song;
Just get a bob tailed bay
Two fortyc[›] as [for] his speed
[and] Hitch him to an open sleigh
And crack! you'll take the lead.
|: chorus :|

Much love to you, scrooge... (Confession, I do think Christmas is way too secularized, just as you do ;D)

Love, Karen

barb said... might have missed my tongue firmly stuck in my cheek ... though I like to make people think. And judging by the looks I get from folks when I mention this topic, I don't think many have given thought to the subtle but pervasive snowman/others stuff phenomenon and how it contributes to moving us away from the meaning of Christmas...for the sake of retail profits. Pretty sad, if you ask me.