Monday, April 4, 2011

the gift of my ordinary days

I recently read The Gift of an Ordinary Day by Katrina Kenison.

An editor for nearly two decades, Kenison is a gifted writer. I admire her skill at crafting words and in Gift she captures a mother's heart as she enters the season of releasing her children into young adulthood. She describes parenting two very different children, a new season in her marriage, and the unsettled desire to start fresh by relocating and building a new house: themes which resonate with me.

Faced with losing her job and unexpected time on her hands in their new home, Kenison grapples with what comes next at mid-life. She writes, "I am ready to sit, to listen, to allow some long dormant part of myself a slow, quiet awakening, an unfurling into new life."

I loved crawling into bed each night to read Kenison's steady prose, and I identify with the rich and raw emotions of a mother nearing the finish line of child-rearing. On the surface it's a beautiful book.

But. For all the 300 pages of outstanding writing, for me this book is disappointingly secular in ways I couldn't ignore. In nearly every corner of her book, Kenison dances close to acknowledging the need for God in the questions of life, but never quite gets there. When Kenison's father-in-law dies and her son questions her about life after death, Kenison evades an answer and points to a full moon as a message from God.

From death to gardening to her sons' growing independence, Kenison looks to nature, other people, and herself for comfort. There was a time when this was my practice, too, but eventually it rang terribly hollow.

Like Kenison, I've found that life's not easy, especially when the inevitable challenges and changes come along. My husband doesn't always understand or love me as I need. Kids push me to the edge. They demand, disobey or disappoint in the face of my unwavering love. My mothering must constantly evolve as my children grow. In the end, no one can really, fully make me happy.

That sums up the simple reason I'm thankful to have a reliable constant in my life: a God who made me, knows me, guides me, loves me more than anyone, cares about every detail of my life, and is the source of true, lasting contentment. And who can handle all my questions ...  about life, love, defiant kids, and what to do when I'm just cranky with life.

Come to think of it, you might say that God is the gift in my ordinary days.

I am the way, the truth and the life.
John 14:6

1 comment:

Donna Boucher said...

Beautifully said.

God is such a big part of my ordinary life....when he is missing from the story or from someone's life....I feel a great emptiness.

But what about God? I wonder.

Even when I struggle...He is always there.
I guess that's the Holy Spirit.