Saturday, May 22, 2010

goodbye, ghastly girdles!

What a blessing that my coming-of-age coincided with the emergence of pantyhose. YES, pantyhose made girdles more or less obsolete in the late 1960's. According to Wikipedia, it was in 1970 that "U.S. sales of pantyhose exceeded stockings for the first time, and has remained this way ever since." Thank goodness!

How do I know that girdles needed to be a thing of the past? I'll tell you how in two words: Mom. Sundays.

On Sunday we'd get to see Mom all dressed up. No casual Sunday dresser was she. A sharp tweedy jacket and skirt. Clip-on earrings. High heels. Or at least pumps. Lipstick! And stockings, held up by those suspender-ish clips dangling off her girdle.

Mom looked so chic, taking us to church and back. But as she stepped through the back door into our kitchen, she morphed into a squealing lunatic.

"Mom, when's lunch?" we'd chorus.

"Ooooooo, let me get this girdle off! I can hardly breathe!" Kicking off her heels and limping down the hall, she lifted her skirt and strained to get a grip on her girdle.

It seemed insane to me that any woman would voluntarily wear a garment that induced such extreme discomfort. Stockings or not. I likened it to a vise grip on the mid-section: a thick elastic tube stretching from waist to thighs.

After witnessing Mom's misery every Sunday for several years, I vowed never to subject myself to the obvious pain brought on by girdle-wearing.

And then. Pantyhose saved the day. They're no thrill ride, either, but sure as heck preferable to girdles. Come to think of it, I haven't worn pantyhose in a long time. Not even at my son's wedding!

Ya know, the good old days weren't always so good.

P.S. It's a sure bet that Mom and my grandmothers, pictured in the previous post, all had on girdles. Mercy, how did they keep smiling through the reception?

4 comments:

Dave Haller said...

Funny post. I didn't even know what a girdle was. But there's no "picture below" like you said...??

Barb said...

I mean the photo in the previous post ...

anne said...

LOL! You, my dear sister, have never had an ounce of fat that you needed to suck in with a girdle in order to lose the tummy and/or thighs for a cute dress - they still exist, and yes, they are extremely uncomfortable! And your sons' weddings were both in the summer - no need for pantyhose, I think you helped plan the dates for those for this reason!

-d said...

Hilarious! I remember my grandmother's same Sunday-after-church girdle-removing event!