don't poison the in-laws

Sadly, middle age has set in. While I find many satisfactory aspects of growing older, the one that trips me up is my eyesight.

Today it dawned on me, probably a few weeks too late, to sprinkle that pre-emergent weed-preventer stuff under our pine trees. Darn those weeds beat and confound me every year.

It was after the sprinkling that I glanced at the label to see if I'd done it correctly. I learned this from my mother: "when all else fails, read the directions," she used to say, and always with a self-indulgent chuckle.

And there on the label, I'm not kidding, I saw:

"Not for use on in-laws."

On closer inspection, of course, I realized it really said,

"Not for use on lawns."

Which is way more sensible. But a lot less humorous.