daughters ... and sons

It's been said that mothers lose their sons when they marry and/or move away. A sort of emotional detachment. I'm discovering that a successful life requires young men to assert their independence. Slaying dragons and all that.

But daughters? I hear that daughters tend to keep their emotional strands connected to their mothers.

While for years I reminded myself that my ultimate purpose in raising children is to release them into the world, the theory has proven much easier than the practice.

Darn it, my little old mom heart wasn't too crazy about letting my boys go, though I knew I must. And once they marry, or drive into the sunset for a career, or become a father, it seems only logical and proper that we cut the apron strings. How can a boy become a man with a hovering mother?

But daughters, at least my daughter, feel different. Katie is 20 now, not fully separated from me, but no longer dependent either. Her voice over the phone rings of growth, maturity, openness. Many of the teenage tensions have faded, giving way to a sweeter friendship between Katie and me. Sometimes our roles even seem to be reversing.

Letting those boys go: old hat by now. But I'm thankful to have a daughter who'll hang around my heart awhile. Until she finds her own dragons.